If you know me or read my work, you already know that I am not a big fan of the word ‘positive’.
Personally, I think it’s an overused catch-all phrase for the self-help genre and for people who are trying to add some good things in their life.
I believe people many times are masking some real issues by telling themselves and others they are being positive.
Be careful, that word can be causing you more harm than good.
Take this past week for example.
I ran a special rate last week for people who wanted private coaching with me and opened up 10 slots that were gobbled up (Thanksgiving reference) pretty fast—and , I was happy about that because I was thrilled to work with these folks.
I absolutely LOVE helping people make the transformation from where they are to where they want to go and beyond.
These latest clients are people of all ages…some pre-teens, teens, college students and adults.
All great people and all would tell you that they spend a great deal of their life being ‘positive’ yet, all of them have some stuff they would like to move through or some inner challenges.
Guess what, we ALL have inner challenges we have to work through and we ALWAYS will.
Let me give you these examples from some of the new clients mentioned above…
- A 13 year old boy who is a great student, a great athlete (football player) and a really nice kid–with wonderful parents– who is really tough on himself and is experiencing some anger and rage and doesn’t know why because he is a really nice kid.
- Another 13 year old boy who is a straight ‘A’ student, an accomplished hockey player and a really warm, insightful & caring boy with a great family. He is experiencing some bullying from other kids and has lost some of his self-confidence which was giving him some anxiety and taking away from his performance.
- An adult who worked through some challenges growing up in a family with a dad who was an alcoholic. Despite attending and working at an IVY league University and tremendous success in their life, they felt unworthy and self-sabotaged their results. They are now working with gaining a deeper understanding so they can help others.
- A college student who was working towards making the varsity hockey team but had some inner demons telling him he wasn’t good enough, strong enough or that he couldn’t figure out how to impress the coach. This is a phenomenal young man and son who has spent his entire life working hard in the classroom and on the ice and would be the poster-child for how parents want their child to turn out. Despite that, he had the inner demons telling him he wasn’t good enough—he is good enough, trust me.
- Another adult who experienced tremendous loss in their life over the past few years. This is someone who had a loving upbringing, graduated with advanced degrees from college, had a successful career, is great parent and loving spouse. They did everything ‘right’ in their life yet, is still experiencing this pain and loss.
- A mom who exemplifies being a great mom…loving to her children, supportive, encouraging, empathetic, intelligent, happy and tough when she needs to be while giving her children every opportunity to grow and learn. One of her children has had some health challenges which causes this mom to wake up many nights in a complete panic wondering if she forgot to give her child their medicine before they went to sleep. She wakes up repeatedly despite the fact that she never forgets the medicine…ever.
There are ALL examples of great people who are working at living a happy and inspired life and if you ask them, they would all say they are pretty positive people…and, I would agree.
Yet, being positive, isn’t the cure-all for what is really boiling underneath and it’s that dangerous turmoil inside of people that can really lead to some serious problems if it’s not address and healed.
It’s not about being positive.
It’s about being aware of what’s going on, it’s about being honest about what you’re feeling or experiencing, it’s about understanding that our experiences in life sometimes leave these emotional scars and it’s about dropping the EGO and being completely vulnerable to the fact that there is some work to be done.
It’s about finally deciding what you want to experience in your life moving forward and committing to that vision!
And, it’s definitely NOT about worrying about how you look to others or what others might think of you or your family or your challenges—trust me, they have some challenges too.
It’s about living life through your own eyes and recognizing what’s wrong and understanding that there is nothing we can’t fix.
Then, it’s about going to the cause inside of us—not outside of us—and dealing with the cause until it’s fixed.
Then you will experience COMPLETE freedom and will no longer be crippled with these challenges on a daily basis.
Anyone can shrink down with life’s challenges and be less than they are capable of being.
I won’t let you do that—I can’t let you do that. It’s about rising up through life’s challenges and meeting them head on so you can live the life you were meant to life, a life filled with happiness, excitement and passion.
It’s about rising up and being a hero in your life…a hero for yourself, a hero for your family and a hero for those people in your life that you will inspire by being the person who had faced these demons and have beaten them.
These people who came into my life this week are heroes because they are vulnerable to the fact that there is work to be done and they are meeting the challenge of doing it—and they will inspire others to do the same.
Here’s to the heroes…here’s to you.
– Coach Mike